Wednesday, May 20, 2009

On the Nations of Wine and Beer

I've decided that I write far too much serious material. Besides the danger of blowing a gasket, I feel the need to reassure my gentle readers that I do, indeed, do more than think about the impending end of the world. I also enjoy myself while anticipating our immanent destruction.

And so this diversion on the topic of wine and beer. Here is the central question: 'Can one be both a wine enthusiast and a beer enthusisiast?' I believe the answer to be 'no', but I suspect that many will disagree.

Wine and beer, for all of their similarities, are not complementary. A simple example: try drinking multiple servings of each in the course of an evening. But more than just the single-night experience - I feel the need to choose betwixt beer and wine. I can't be dedicated to both.

If it comes to a decision, it's really no decision. I vastly prefer wine to beer. But that does not make the choice less painful - I also love beer.

You may say, "TL, this is all in your head! It's absolutely silly to imagine that you have to choose betwixt beer and wine. One can harbor a love for both in the same palate." In response I say, "Hogwash. You either love only one, or you love neither, and in any case you don't understand."

Not to say that one couldn't pick one and enjoy the other on occasion. That is all well and good. But to be an enthusiast? You must choose.

Perhaps my angst is a result of my mixed Etruscan and Anglo heritage. Or perhaps it is a result of my working class roots - seeing my dad drink his nightly course of Naragansett for many years as a child. I don't know.

I tell you this - there is a mysterious quality to both wine and beer that make them something more than a drink. They put you in a camp, a tribe. And these tribes are at war. A citizen of both is equally a traitor to each.

Currently, there is no beer in my fridge. Can I make a clean break? Can I proclaim my fidelity to the vinyard and renounce the field? Perhaps. At least until the Super Bowl.

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